The real truth

Many people try to convince you to believe in the same things they believe, some of them tried harder than others, because they are sure his true is the only true.

The beliefs cover almost everything: sports, religion, economy, conspiracy, life goals, best super hero... And is probably you will never agree.

You can speak with different people about those topics, everyone have his personal opinion and have something to say... (well at least, the people who thinks). The problem begin when one of you try to impose your posture, you can trow many arguments to defend your belief, but certainly you won't be able to change his mind (well, as long as the people you choose are smart). But how we could know if your truth is the unique truth and the more true.

In science we should be able to accept new hypothesis, therefore we are more open minded and we can debate, research and experiment, then is our goal to find the truth. There is a big difference with the fanatics, they don't need evidence to talk, they only need believe in their own things, that is why exist so many problems, they don't want to argue about the matter.

But, you should say something to other people or you should keep your thoughts for yourself? I think we have the freedom to express our opinion and the people have enough reasoning to decide if they believe us a little or nothing, even they can counter argument and give us new information about the topic we don't know.

The other problem is, some of that beliefs are bad things (well at least for the most of the people who believe en rights and the freedom... Because we can't establish what is a bad thing for now, is the same thing, most of our concepts about ethics are invents of more humans based on more human behaviors) and if this kind of people are fanatics, well that is a big trouble... Make some of them change his mind, it's a long and painful way that no one should take. You will need a lot of time and patience, you need bring more information, scientific facts and even other people who believe in the same way you do.

In the end there is not a real truth, nevertheless some people refuse to believe that... I don't fight with them because is a waste of time, furthermore i don't have proves of the truth, i only think in life and stuff.

Sometimes you just need accept it

There are many things we want to do in our life, but some of us don't meet limits and when we trace our goals, we aim to high and don't measure the impact... On the other hand there are many factor influencing the nature of the world, and thus we really don't have control of the situation. We only have our decisions, and sometimes, they are not enough.

The promise to make personal projects, to have a healthy life, to have better habits and leave the vices. The good day when you will be a better person... That time when you will change, never comes. And all that good choices you do o and fail because other people decisions and the random number generator (in real life).

We become frustrated by what happens and the lack of control, but there are one thing we can do in those cases: Accept it. You know what you can control, and what you can do. You know your limits, and you also know when is time to leave and let go. You need to clean your life, you can't have a long to do list, it's simply insane.

There are people out there, whom really don't care what you do or who you are, nevertheless, you don't need care about it, you can try the times you considerate enough and, if they don't be agreed, you just let it go and change the plan.

Stop with the frustration, because is never healthy, and you probably don't get anything good. You should fight, but you need to know when give up and change the strategy.

"You can do anything, but you can't do everything".

It isn't enough for people

I always think be nice with people was enough to have their attention, and maybe with that, somebody likes me. But the people don't care, they need more! Because never is enough.

First at all, you need topics to talk with people, because always are talking about themselves and that is why you continuously need something to say.

I'm boring, because my adventures occur in my mind or in my computer. I always trying to learn new things from the magic world of Internet, and sometimes I'am losing the time in there. But I really don't care go outside and talk with people, if I can learn stuff in my place. Therefore I don't take courses, I don't go to schools... And that is a big problem because, people love meet new people in that kind of place. What a tragedy...

On the other hand, I'm very ok, with my lifestyle... The problem is when i try to meet new people, who don't know me, and thinks than i am like the others... So uncomfortable... Also i think they need the same kind of people to enjoy... Maybe that is the problem, I don't know where is my place in this world... I am so weird.

Why people? Why can you explore new thinking forms? Why are you so closed minds?

I believe i struggle too much... I should search people whom appraise me.

But how can i meet that people? If i can't meet new people? Man, that is so confused... Or maybe not.
Maybe i only need to go outside and meet many different people and experiment until meet the correct people for me... although the problem is i am very "clingy" and that demands me part of my memory and therefore my feelings.

People! please don't hurt me. Be honest and don't talk to me if you don't want a person who really care about you. Stay away and don't be nice with me because i grow so fond with nice people and i am constantly going to try to be nice with you.

I need a manual about how to make friends and, at the same time, don't care about them.

I need to be more interesting for people so... I need to go outside more often.... And I need a new hobbie... something to force me to meet new people... I need to be more tolerant with new people...

My opinions appear to be not enought... Do you believe than i need make more and think less ? That sounds hard!!

My ideas and my speed processor should be acceptable. I don't know.... Life doesn't have sense.

Do not look for me

I really mad with people and their reciprocity-less... Because when someone try to be nice, nobody cares. And that means we should not be nice with people.

Yeah, that is the truth, we don't owe nothing to this world. We are nice because we feel good, and those persons destroy that feelings.

So please, don't look for me, if you don't care, i don't care neither.

I need to stop looking for toxic people, but what can i do, if i care a little... if i'm curious about their life... I am puzzle lover, and people problems are so easy to solve... And then my problems appear and it is not that easy anymore.

But hey, i need attention, that is the real issue, why people don't ask me "how it was my day", my ego need that... I want to tell my stories, that is what life means... But it's ok, someday i am going to do something important and everyone ask about it, and then i will not response... I am so evil....

Ok, maybe only need to find new people who really cares about myself, (not fans, that's awful) something like a good friend... But how people makes friend today in the world... I don't know. But i want to change all my social circle... New people is what i need.

You don't care to the world, that is true... So we ask about people to meeting, to be nice with them and maybe for to be there.

Humans are so complex, and boring, and selfish...

How does it feels?

I feel really sad when i see you, when you are there needing for orders, for commands, like a simple computer.

You are part of the system, but don't overestimate my comment, you are only a pawn, easy replaceable, and you like that way to live, because you don't need to think.

How does it feels that you need someone to tell you how to live?

Are you happy being the someone else puppet? Cause that is what you are when you choose not be free, you life belong to the system. And you go and work and think "yeah, this is what i want", so where is the dreams? Being the best? I don't want to be the best slave... I choose my studies because that is what i like to do, and i need a work for apply them.

But that is not the only problem, you need more than that, you need a society to rule your world, you need specific instructions to how to be a good man. So you follow a trend, and you feel comfort and safe.

I don't blame you, it's hard to be independent, because the freedom can make you crazy, and live like an hedonist, the fun is so attractive and you have so much time, or at least, that's what you think. But the reality is different, you have a limit and you need to be satisfied. 

Are you happy with your life? It's enough good? I think never is enough, but we can have some breaks for clear the mind.

You are alone in this world, and you need to be strong. If you want to follow your dreams, you are late for learn stuff. Why do you need someone tell you that? You will never reach far if you don't work.

How does it feels not be free? I don't want that.

Her (Or at least she)

I recently have so many thinks about what i feel...

How could i know if my feelings are real. If I think they are real, is that a good argue to say they are real?

I really want to believe that your feelings about me are special, but that's only a thing in my mind. The real problem is: Who could i know if you have feelings for me? And how could i know if that feelings are real? I think what i feel is real... But are they real?

The feelings are only a mix of brain signals and hormones, in theory i can control the brain signals but the hormones depend of multiple factors. Maybe are only sensor responses (engineer stuff)... And that means the response is linked to the experiences, the memories...

But if the feelings are just chemistry... When the reaction is over, what's left is real? Or throughout the hormones are present, those feelings are real.

If you feel something sometime, are that some-feeling real? or just some real? Are my thoughts real just because they are mine?

What if a believe you have feelings about me, and you actually don't have any of them. If i believe those are real, are those real?

And what happend if you tell me about your feeling, and you lie, If i believe you, are the feelings real?

If you make me feel happy, are my feelings for you real? Or i have only feelings about your actions. Thus, if i'm only a lot of memories, the people that i know are only an array of memories in my brain about them.

I think about the feelings, cause i have feelings, but i don't know anymore if they are real... Cause you don't have them or, at least, you tell me that you don't. Although the feelings are changing all the time, because people change, and that means you can change your feelings in the future...

So for me, what a i feel are not real, until i will be conscience about my feelings... And what you feel, maybe i never know the answer, only if i ask... But you give me a answer before (and i don't like it, that make it unreal?).

I can influence your environment... and... i don't know... Maybe one day you give me a different answer. Are you real with me?

That time when i don't hate the life

I don't know why sometimes i have those moments, but they feel nice! It is like i want really have a long and good life. When i realize that there is a lot of thing i want to do.

It's like have a good new, or smile for fun, smell a good scent, or see something beautiful.

Yeah, I know "desire makes us miserable" (Buddhism word)... But that's ok, because i feel good when that happens. Is that life? Or is that happiness? Perhaps be happy is only for the present, but the imagination is so powerful, i can feel it and maybe never happen.

Great, I feel so excited about that, maybe these little moment are my most powerful motivations to keep trying hard.

I want to do so many things so i need to do a list, maybe another day i going to burn it, because sadness! No problem, more good times will appear. I don't hate people for have better life than me (At this moment...), they motivate me in a negative way...

For now, i going to enjoy my moment, maybe tomorrow i going to try something new and learn some useful stuff.

If you are reading this, please feel no hated for me in the past! (i can't tell you how i going to think in the future).

It's late or not (for a change)

Yes, i'm back with another self-debate.
At this moment, i'm a big failure for me (others don't matter), so i was thinking, we hear a lot about take chances and oportunities, and how we lose it cause the time doesn't wait anyone.

It's late, you lost your oportunity of your life, and everyone knows that you are a looser if you don't even tried. So there i am, with a big depression and i still complain about my way to life.

No, it's no late for a change in my life, i can learn new stuff, i can meet new people, and i can live like only me know. Only need a little push to start a new project, only need to remeber how i am, and why all the people say those words: "Cause you are..."

It's late, maybe... But not that all... Yes, i am getting old and my brain is going to down his perfomance (yes, for me is an "he"), but i can try to fight with that, i cann't live thinking that i don't made all i can. I need to be smart, that's my thing... and be funny... (yeah... we're going to work with that later).

I need to do a lot of stuff, and everytime i see other people proud of his steem, i feel sick, cause i hate that narcisism, but the real thing is i feel jelous of his perfect life (their life of lies... but in their world, is perfect), i can feel that way, i never will be enought for me (i blame my parents for that) so, i need to keep trying.

It's late and i lost a lot of oportunities, but... i have enought time to recover myself. I need to be me, and i want it because that is my proud, the only important thing for my little brain and my unfullness life.

Time to change.

Good bye my friend

As if all my life were not enough, now you are gone.

I going to miss you so much, cause you was a true friend.

Maybe you don't understand words, but you understand love, and that is what matters.

You leave me so many memories, over 16 years, at this moment it is 2/3 of my life, i can't remember my life without you.

I need apologize with you, cause i leave you so many times, even when i go to study my career, i let you in home, with the family. Every time i back i loved to see you.

I didn't know how to be a good keeper, and i'm sorry for that, may be that will be help you... maybe not... Life is very strange. You didn't care about it, and i appreciated that so much.

You always be happy, and i want remember you in that mood. We never really fight, we just have differences.

I will keep your memory for the rest of my life, i promise you.

And I going to remind everyone, you was a member of this family and you always going to have your place.

That was the most painful farewell in my life, but i'm glad now you are in peace.

This is the end my dear friend, i always going to love you.

I am a big disappointment

No, this is not about my terrible English.

At this time, i could count my uncompleted tasks in life (even in the year), i only fail and fail again.

Probably is my fault for aim big targets, but it's people fault cause they say me that i can do it...

But is my fault again because i make they think than i'm good and smart (and handsome... shut up self stem), although it's they fault because they don't test me in a hard situation...

Anyway i have the guilt, i allow this affect me, all about this stuff depress me. Cause i'm not enough good for that people who say i am good in things. But i should not worry about what other people say about me. So, the problem is i can only disappoint myself...

I really want be better...

Internet says, you should only compare with your older you, maybe Internet is right. But it's hard.

I know what i can do, but maybe i am to lazy to do it, i can't blame other people for not push me to better things, maybe in my childhood, but now... I'm totally capable to do things.

"You can do anything, but you can't do everything". That phrase touches very depth in my thoughts.

So that mean, i need to choose things, and i need organize my time, and avoid distracting stuffs (like games and Internet because they have a big impact in my time and my reward mental system).

I hate myself in this moment. But, at the same time, i hate fail to people and myself, and i enjoy challenges... So, here i come.

How to be better in school

Ok maybe i'm not the best person to say something about study, because i hated so much... It's so boring! But hey! I survived and i have my bachelor degree (in anytime). Maybe a lot of people are gonna say things like "Yeah, but you are smart" or "But i can't", and a long list of prejudices.

I will make a list of things in my mind about this topic... so, this will be fast.

1. Be curious. If you learn something new, maybe you can think new questions about that subject, like in history, a certain year for a whatever event, you may learn what happens in the same time in another region, or the consequence for that event.

2.- Learn new things. Everyday if you can, probably not in school. In this time and maybe the time when you are reading this (Except if the Internet collapse... although may be you can't read this... anyway), you can investigate in Internet and learn a lot stuff, sometimes useful and others... well i learn how to tying shoelaces faster... you judge it.

3.- Enjoy learning. Many people don't care about what they learn, but you can share your new knowledge about whatever random fact and be satisfied if the listen to you. Any fun fact can be useful in the future, trust me.

4.- Learn in your particular way. I know so many persons who says "Maths is really hard", i think that is because they try to learn the method of the professor, and they fail because his professor stinks teaching. So, you can see algorithms in maths, and you can try to do Inverse engineering and find the way that work, then you can make your own method and save the day. That's what i try to teach to other people, think by yourself.

5.- Memory is practice. If you can't memorize a lot of useless facts or words or definitions, you can use absurd technique to learn it, like nemotechnique (or however writes in english). You need to practice this stuff, maybe with in random book, a random paragraph, and repeat it. Or maybe you can make didactic material and study with that, sometimes the make process works more than the study. And the infallible method, "play" memorize with another person, that helps a lot.

6.- Learn with someone else. The academic path is hard and heavy, but if you have some friend, maybe it will become more enjoyable and fun (I hope, if not, what kind of friend have you?). And you can add, like a negative motivation, a rival or people saying to you that "you can't", that helps a lot, cause you can show them back his mistake. But seriously, with friend or a random happy people, you can compare results, you can study together , you can make team and more important, you can enjoy learning.

That's all for now, maybe i will update the post in a future if i remember more tips (Historically that never happens). If you estimated reader have another advice for the future generations, please share with us in the commentary section.

(And please, tell me my mistakes in my writting)

The New Challenge

It passed a long time and i think it's time to come back to the business. At this time maybe you have noticed than i am writing in English, and you ask me "why?"... Well it's a long and funny story about the language... Ok maybe not so long, i need to practice a little more because it will be necessary to use in the future.

Let me explain all this stuff, first of all i already finished my career and i obtain my bachelor degree of engineer (any time it will be in my hands). So the next step in my World Domination Plan is a change of my country and  it's probably that i gonna need more than just Spanish, so there i am, trying new things. I was studying German language for the future (oh! spoiler alert) and it's hard but the English is priority right now (ok, maybe both, but i'm not good with that much pressure). 

So for now, this is how i gonna keep writing in this blog, so if you see a lot of mistakes, please let me know about it, i really need the retro-feed to be a better English writer, and why not you can suggest new topics to use different grammatical structures because i would take a English course.

Now a little of story about me since last time... I back to home...That's all what i get, it's really nothing new. But my feelings stuff and thinks about whatever things maybe works for this (Likes always... Even if it never work before).

It will be worst when i need to write a formal document for a Master degree (oh! more spoiler alerts) but for now i just need to prove myself than i can do this challenge. Definitively i need more vocabulary and read more to know more phrases and stop to try to speak like Spanish language.

PS: I need a work (Spoiler alert), please i program and design for food.